Scarred for Life

When I was younger, my family called our girlie private parts your "tooney." Not that private parts were ever discussed. It was more like when you got out of the tub, my mom would ask "did you wash your tooney?"

One day, when I was about seven years old, I playing in my playroom while watching one of my favorite shows, "Donny & Marie." I loved those two crazy Mormons! I was only half watching when they started singing a song and dancing. The song went something like this:

"Shake your tooneys

Shake your tooneys,

Yeah, yeah!"

I stopped dead in my tracks. Why on earth would Donny & Marie be singing about tooneys? Why would ANYONE sing about tooneys? They must be some kind of sickos! It looked like they were actually trying to shake their tooney's while singing it! I almost ran to my mom and told her when I realized what they were really singing:

"Shake your two knees

Shake your two knees

Yeah, yeah!"

Yes, I was scarred for life by Donny & Marie.